Frank O’Connor: A True Irishman

When we were kids and my Uncle Frank would call the house we always knew when it was him because my mom would snap her fingers to indicate we needed to run and grab her cigs. It was going to be a while. My Uncle Frank had a knack for making a long story longer. Much like my brother Juan. Tomorrow is the one year deathiversary of my beloved UFO. Uncle Frank O'Connor. My mom's brother. For those who aren't in the know, my mom's maiden name was O'Connor. And…

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I Gotta Guy. His Name is Uncle Ter.

One year ago today we lost one of the best. My Godfather. My beloved Uncle Terry. And life will never quite been the same. Uncle Ter had a guy for everything. You needed something? You called Uncle Ter, he'd have a guy for you. I don't know what the hell you need, and Uncle Ter probably didn't either. But I'll still bet my bottom dollar down that he had a guy for you. Because he did. Uncle Ter was my guy. And that guy to so many others. I got…

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My Experience Over At The Community College

I can't believe I've never told this story before. I recently shared an old story on Facebook. And it brought a bunch of memories flooding back. It was almost as if I had wished this part of my life away. But no matter where I go or what I do, there it is. I'm reminded often of this dark time in my existence. I was a little lost. In life. Just trying to figure out what the hell I was going to do. With said life. My cousin Barry and…

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Read more about the article My doctor is hotter than your doctor.
BEFORE

My doctor is hotter than your doctor.

The worst. It's a Tuesday morning and a kid walks up to me on my way out the door and says, I don't feel good. The kid who only says that when they're really actually sick. So I went right into hero mode.  Since it's a Tuesday, I will stay home and take you to the doctor. Because according to my diary- Bollywood works the urgent care clinic today. No, Beau, you go ahead and go to work. I will take the day off and stay home with our poor,…

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I took Aunt Batsy to the mall. I will shop exclusively online from this moment forward.

Taking Aunt Batsy and three kids to the mall is like entering a burning building. Without a hose. Without oxygen. Yet somehow I survive to tell about it. Just like anyone entering a burning building, I knew my chances were slim. But I still went through with it. Because Aunt Batsy has a freaking coupon. We are only going to Macy's. So I trick myself into thinking it might just be okay. But it wasn't. I'm a really bad tricker. And not only does she have a coupon, but she…

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Teaching kindergarten last period on a Friday. Chill the damn wine.

Whoa. The first few weeks of school. It's been real. To begin, allow me to introduce myself. I am a school counselor. Who teaches Character Education. To children in grades K-8. Now even though this is my absolute dream job, it does come with a few drawbacks. I am forbidden by law to name names, but allow me to paint the picture. I love working with kids in the upper grades. They get me. It's my jam. They laugh politely at my jokes. And roll their eyes at me behind…

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After all these years. I still have no clue about football.

My name is Eileen and I am forty-two years old and I still don't understand football. There I said it. It feels good to get that off my big chest. Forty-two years of trying. Sometimes even really trying. To understand this damn game. And still nothing. I spent my twenties watching every single Chicago Bear's game ever played. An entire decade devoted to a sport I don't even like. An entire decade devoted to getting drunk on Sundays. But still nothing. I always just skated by. Wearing the jerseys. Kitty-killing…

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My Nice Cooking Lesson With My Nice Italian Family

I’ve been on a real Italian kick lately. Because Beau is part Italian. Which makes my kids even parter Italian. So it’s important to me to get to know their people.  A few weeks ago a group of us decided to go to Italian Fest. Which is the absolute dumbest place to go when you’re trying to not eat carbs. But then I remembered Italian people like wine. So I went. All I can say for sure is that a good time was had by all. Being Italian for the…

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I survived the first day of school. Kinda.

Today was the first day of school for my kids. We’ve had an amazing summer. But it’s time. Just time. Time to start fresh. Time to get back in the swing of things. Time to get on living our lives. Back to School I love the first day of school. Everyone is up and at ‘em. Everyone is excited. Everyone is so clean. Shining like the top of the Chrysler Building. And everyone is so full of hope. Maybe a little too much hope. Like me, for instance. I’m bringing my…

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Welcome To My New Home!

Hi everyone! I know it's been a while, but my new blog website is finally complete! So I will now be sharing new content weekly. If you'd like, take a second to look around. Read some old posts. Buy some new merch.  And don't forget to... Subscribe! Subscribe! Subscribe! I'm so excited to be back and looking forward to writing a ton. I have had so much happen this past year. OMG. Where do I begin? Stay tuned!!!! Love, Eileen

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