I Don’t Care Who You’re Voting For. Really, I Don’t.

I love the month of March. It’s still snowing but it doesn’t matter because you know it will be warm soon. St. Patrick’s Day falls right in the middle of the month, so you’re guaranteed a good time. And there’s Easter to symbolize new beginnings. It’s just a hope filled month.

The only thing raining on my South Side Irish parade this year is politics. It’s election time in Chicago. The primary is a little over a week away.

I don’t like primaries. I don’t like having so many options. Give me a general election any day. But the primary? No thanks.

It’s like eating at a Greek restaurant with a twelve page menu. There are too many choices! Do you want breakfast for dinner? Well I didn’t. Until now. Now maybe I do want some moons over my hammy. I just can’t decide!

One big happy family.
One big happy family.

One thing I hate doing is declaring myself as a Republican or a Democrat. Because I don’t know what I am. I’ll take a little from the right side of the menu and a little from the left side of the menu. And a side of sausage. Patties, not links.

The only thing I know for damn sure is that I don’t care who you are voting for. Not in the least. So don’t tell me. I can’t even pretend to care.

And don’t ask me. Don’t ever ask me how much I weigh and don’t ask me who I’m voting for. Honestly, I don’t know the answer to either question. Besides, it’s none of your damn business.

I hate getting stuck in a situation where someone is telling me who they are voting for. All I can think in my head is, I didn’t ask. If someone wants to know who you are voting for, they’ll ask. Trust me on this one. And everyone else will politely talk about the weather. Like you’re supposed to.

The only person I enjoy talking politics with is Shelly. We’re on the same page. I thought Bernie Madoff was in jail. Will Donald Trump have a presidential reality show? Why is everyone so upset that Hillary is always emailing on her phone? How do you think Melania would decorate the white house?

I’m scared about everything that is going on in our country. This is the first election that I’m really thinking about my kids and their future. Four years ago I had four babies at home. Now I’m looking at four little people that need this country to be a different place when they grow up. A lot can change in four years.

Whenever I think of Donald Trump becoming president, I think of the scene from Back to the Future. The one where Doc asks Marty McFly who the president is in 1985. Marty responds, Ronald Reagan. Doc laughs in disbelief and says, Ronald Reagan the actor?

If we could go back to the future thirty years from now and someone asked the same question it would be an even crazier response. Who is running for president in 2016? Donald Trump the reality television star?

Next thing you know that busboy Goldie Wilson will be mayor. You just never know.

I will be very happy when this primary election is over. I’m over the commercials. I’m over all the junk mail. I’m over the social media rants. I’m over all the mud slinging on television. I’m just over.

The thing that really gets me is the people who seem to be most vocal about politics tend to be the people who are not even registered voters. You don’t get to say a damn thing if you’re not even going to vote. Exercise your right instead of exercising your mouth.

And how did people debate politics before Facebook? Some of the things people write on Facebook never ceases to amaze me. Do they know that other people can see what they write? As the kids say, Shaking My Head.

We live in the greatest country in the world. We have freedoms that a lot of people would kill for. Literally. We have the privilege of living in a democracy and the privilege of voting. Get your ass out there and do it. I don’t care who you vote for. Just freaking vote!

“I don’t believe in luck, but I believe in hope.”

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