Pregnant Reality

Nothing makes me happier than a good, not that there is a bad one, episode of 16 and Pregnant. And I know I’m not alone on this one because they’re on like their twentieth season. I think one of the gals this year was one of the original babies born in season one. Nothing has changed. Every season has pretty much been the same. Even though I know what to expect, I still can’t believe my eyes. I just can’t stop watching.

It’s a shame it’s only middle-aged women that watch this show. Too bad it’s not really sixteen-year-olds. But they’re too busy sneaking around having actual sex while we’re too busy trying to avoid it. By watching reality television. I’ll come right into bed, Beau. Just as soon as Aleah, the diabetic reformed bad girl who must juggle a new baby and being a stepmom, gives birth. Beau doesn’t share my enthusiasm on this one. But seriously, a step-mom at sixteen. Whoa.

I also like to note the similarities between myself and these young girls. I like to sit around in pajamas all day texting. I have no clue what I’m going to do with my life. I don’t really know what I’m doing when it comes to raising children. The list goes on and on. Maybe that’s why I love it so much. And they do make it look easy with their little sixteen year-old metabolisms. These gals give birth and put their cheerleading uniforms right back on in time for the big homecoming game. You’ll never catch one of them wearing maternity jeans when the baby is three.

I think an even better idea for a show would be 45 and Pregnant. Because that’s a helluva lot scarier than being sixteen and pregnant, if you ask me. At sixteen you are unable to comprehend what you are in for. You have energy and are full of life. There is hope.  At forty-five you know exactly what you’re in for. You’ve been there. You’ve lived it. You’re scared. A scared you have never been before. And you’re too smart to have hope.

Barbara Evans

Babs is my fave. She’d also make a great 45 and Pregnant.

In this new version of the show, people will mistake you for the child’s grandmother. Because you should be. Your kids are practically grown. What are you going to do with a baby? The chances are pretty good that a forty-five year old has a sixteen year-old at home. I imagine your older children asking, well how did this happen? Just like the parents do on 16 and Pregnant. It would be a total role reversal. Your kids would be embarrassed to be seen with you in public as if that baby bump was a scarlet letter. They would have to reconcile with the fact that their parents do indeed still have sex. They would require extensive therapy. You were just starting to look forward to retiring. You could kiss that dream good-bye being forty-five and pregnant. Chances are you’ll be dead, before you can retire. Maybe this isn’t such a good idea for a show after all.

The similarities on these two shows really are uncanny. Although, I think it might be a little harder to get a forty-five year old woman to agree to film her unplanned pregnancy and delivery. But then again, maybe not. I still don’t understand how they cast this show. Do the producers scurry through garbage cans looking for positive pregnancy tests? Do the young girls pee on a stick and then call MTV? Are OBGYNs in cahoots with MTV? It’s pretty impressive that they can find these pregnant girls in such a timely manner and film the entire pregnancy and subsequent disaster. And who signs off on this? The pregnant teen? The baby daddy? A parental unit? I guess it really doesn’t matter. I’m just glad they did.

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