My Nice Cooking Lesson With My Nice Italian Family

I’ve been on a real Italian kick lately. Because Beau is part Italian. Which makes my kids even parter Italian. So it’s important to me to get to know their people.  A few weeks ago a group of us decided to go to Italian Fest. Which is the absolute dumbest place to go when you’re trying to not eat carbs. But then I remembered Italian people like wine. So I went. All I can say for sure is that a good time was had by all. Being Italian for the…

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OMG. Homework in May. I. Can. Not.

It's May. It's finally warm. It's baseball season. My life is so out of control right now that I don't know whether to scratch my watch or wind my butt. A typical day consists of getting up and going to work. Easiest part of my day. Because when that bell rings at 2:45 it's worse than the alarm going off in the morning. Time to start my for real day. The hundreds of students I see on the daily are no match for the four I have at home. Once…

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I’m Back. New Year. Pretty Much Same Me.
We even dress alike.

I’m Back. New Year. Pretty Much Same Me.

So I took a little time off from writing. I just needed to recharge and regroup. And really concentrate on my other passion. Drinking. Best thing I could have done. Because now I'm back and ready to rock. My holidays were amazing. Santa was extremely generous to my kids. And some day soon I may actually pick up the remaining wrapping paper that's littering my basement and put away the decorations. But for now I'm content with just closing the basement door. On New Year's Eve we took the kids…

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Please Stop Telling Kids What to Wear and Who to Be. Just Let Them Be Kids.

My cousin Shelly called me last night to tell me about a story she saw on the news. There is a little girl in Indiana that wanted to make her first communion wearing a suit instead of a dress. You heard me. This little 9 year-old girl had the gall to want to wear pants. Pants. In public. On one of the holiest days of her life. She was told she could not wear the suit because she has a vagina and she would have to wear a dress or…

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How Having Kids Will Make You Look Forward to Going to the Dentist

I got a message the other day from my friend Moe. He was telling me how much his life has changed since having kids. He has two small children so a trip to the dentist alone is now a real treat for him. Thought about your blog today. The kids were waking up from naps and I was about to get the change me, feed me, bring me outside, I just woke up I'm cranky attitude from them. But lucky me I had a dentist appointment! I used to hate…

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It Takes a Freaking Village to Raise These Kids

We hear it all the time. It takes a village. We can't possibly raise these kids on our own. We need everyone's help. And it's so true. Doing my research for this post I read that Hillary Clinton wrote a book about this subject. And that conservatives went nuts and claimed it doesn't take a village. It takes a family to raise a child. It takes both. Duh. I yell at other people's kids often. And every time I do, I think of how it takes a village. And how…

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What I Need the World to Know About Raising a Gender Nonconforming Child

When my husband and I decided to have kids we didn't put all that much thought into it. Because we had been drunk for ten years. But we have learned that there is never really anything that can prepare you for having children. You just do it and figure it out as you go along. I'm pretty sure this is what everyone does. It's a total crap shoot. You're not guaranteed anything. Everyone just goes into it hoping for the best. The day we had our first born son was…

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Dear Children, Please Stop Flipping Your Flipping Water Bottles

If one more flipping kid flips one more flipping water bottle I'm going to flipping lose it. I thought my kids were all becoming diabetics the way they've been constantly asking for water all summer long. But I finally caught on. They're not drinking the flipping water. They're flipping the flipping water. Bottles. All summer long I've been listening to bottles flipping all over my damn house. It's driving me insane. I make them go outside and I can still hear it on the deck. I can hear it on the…

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