27 Things That Happen at My Pool. Every Freaking Day

I love having a pool. It’s like an instant party all summer long. And if there’s one thing I love, it’s a party. And if there’s another thing I love, it’s relaxing. Having a pool means having people over all the time. Which I also totally love. I can’t imagine what summer would be like without a pool. The kids splashing away. Laughing with one another. Creating memories to last a lifetime. If only Norman Rockwell was here to paint this freaking picture. Goggles. The bane of my existence. Here’s what…

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How to Get This Bloated, Apple-Shaped, Postpartum, Borderline Alcoholic Bod That Dreams Are Made Of

The question I get asked the absolute most by people is, "Do you really drink as much as you say you do?" The answer is no. Of course I don't. I could never write about how much I actually drank or my kids and house and liver would be taken away. The second question people always ask is how I maintain this mannish figure after thirty nine years of livin' and vaginally birthing four children. I've decided it's time to share my secrets. It's just not fair to the rest…

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